The Nightmare before Election Day

(by Christene Pinter, Nov 1, 2008)

‘Twas all Hallows Eve and America’s souls

Were already lining up at the polls.

Their aching bones tired of 8 dreadful years,

And with just 5 days left to change gears,

They turned up in masses like never before

to make sure their voices made the score.


But behind the curtain, voters beware,

A trickster was brewing a terrible scare!

Rigging the polls in 13 states

to try and make up for the lost debates

where the running mistress of Mr. McCain

had proven to be just a jingling babbling ball-and chain.


When voting day came, ‘twas life or death,

And all the world watched with baited breath

As states changed from grey to blue, but then to blood red -

So different from what the preliminaries had said!

The trickster’s evil plot of right-wing domination

Dashed the hopes of the world, not just the nation.


Out in the streets there were demons abound

Riots broke out, the dead rose from the ground

Even the media, tired of repression

Reported these scenes of mass depression

The old and young howled and worried women wailed

All only wishing that truth had prevailed


Then, up to the day of inauguration

The incumbents planned the world’s degradation:

They first built a fence to make it real hard

For the Russians to swim into Sarah’s back yard

They set up more tax breaks for the filthy rich

and cut regulations for the white-collar snitch.


They boosted morale for the babes in the war

And promised them jobs on some oil rig offshore

"if ya come back alive," they added, not scoffin’

"if ya don’t, your ma’s taxes will pay for your coffin."

Anyway many more babes be made,

For they were certain to overturn Roe v. Wade.


Then an under-aged bride in an off-white tent

Gave birth to the grandkid of the Vice President.

All around the new mom, fluted glasses went: "Clink!"

But the mom just sipped cider; she was too young to drink.

They rang in the New Year with fresh moose and firewood

And toasted to the two percent for whom life was good.


Then on the 20th, as the nightmare unfolds

McCain hobbles up to the stage, looking old.

He and Mrs. Palin have prepared their speeches

And as he recites, the microphone screeches.

All those big words prove too much for his heart

And the last one comes out like a long ... dying ... fart.


He topples aside and the world is aghast

That his tombstone might read: "His first day was his last"

And now Palin who’s dumb, and dumbfounded to boot,

since she can’t make a sentence or curse, says, "Oh, shoot!"

So the crowd, there to honor the right wings’ rights

Unbuckle their holsters and aim for the night.


The fireworks ensue (and so does this beeping)

Ah! My alarm, could it be I was sleeping?

I switch on the news - yes! Still four days left!

to save the White House from imminent theft.

And to do so there’s one thing all souls should do :

- I’ve already voted Obama...have you?


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